05 March 2013

A Real Conversational Zinger

I had only been there for a matter of seconds. Not long enough to sit down and get comfortable. Not long enough for the kids to get their shoes off and go play. Not even a minute had passed since I walked through the door.

And already, another mom was talking to me.

I was happy -- I often have a hard time carrying on conversation, or at least initiating it, with other women I don't know. But here she was, striking up a random conversation about our kids.

How old was S.? Boy, she was cute. And so tall! [Like I don't hear that every day!] And was the little boy mine, as well? How old is he?

Then she really came out with it: "Wow. So close together? You just had them back to back, didn't you?!"

Guys -- my kids are exactly two years, two months and two days apart! Is that really back to back, as she was telling me? I clearly had over a year where I wasn't pregnant. I got back to pre-pregnancy size. Enjoyed my moments with S. while she was a little baby. Made memories and enjoyed being a family of three before we even considered becoming a family of 4.

For us, this is what works. We hadn't entirely planned S. but weren't exactly taking measures to avoid a pregnancy at that time, either. But L. was completely planned. I wanted to hold out another month or two to ensure we didn't have a Christmas baby ... but He had other plans in mind.

Our kids are best friends. They love to play together. Get along great. Look for each other when one isn't around. Miss each other when they aren't together. L. gets sad -- and it's obvious in his actions and expressions -- when we get in the car to go somewhere and I don't have his sister with us. And S. is always so concerned about her baby brother, asking if he's okay, hugging and kissing him, helping him do things and trying to teach him everything in her world.

Their friendship ... their relationship ... to me is such a beautiful thing.

Would they have that if we had spaced them out even more? I don't know. Maybe that still would. Or maybe S. would feel more motherly instead of friendly, and would try to guide L. in that manner. If they were closer together, would I have been able to give them both my complete and utter attention every time they needed it? Maybe ... maybe not. There is no telling.

But what I know is this: We made the choices that we made in the best interest of our family. So whether the world thinks we spaced our children too far apart, or had them back to back ... who are they to judge? Our family is full of love, and in the end, that's what matters the most.


  1. That's not back to back!!! That's lady is crazy!! Back to back would be like a year apart!

    Ramblings of a Suburban Mom

  2. That is far from back to back. I think that's a great age to have or talk about having another one. I don't know how long we will wait to have another child but that is for my husband and I to decide. Other people's negative comments are always so unwanted and even rude at some points. Also, your children are adorable! I'm so happy they look out for one another! My sister and I was never and have never been close and I regret that. I feel as if your siblings should be your best friends.